Yes.

 I've come really understand how important it is to say YES! to many things. By that I don't mean to be one of those people who gets rail roaded into saying yes to too much of anything. I mean it to be saying yes to life. Yes to love. Yes to difficult situations that may in the end reap joy, happiness, and love.

Everyday I say yes to patience, love, and joy with my children. This may not always work, of course.... but I think it greatly helps. I say yes to loving a man who tests that patience, but who I love unconditionally, in a way I most of the time cannot express. I say yes to loving my family, in all their imperfect perfection.

As far as choices go, I try to remember to say yes to new things:: new job (I get to work from home! How can I not say yes!), and now, to a new baby. You see, I'm pregnant. While this was not a planned thing (um, hello... me, 3 kids, Cole 2... now 1 together... YIKES! ) I am saying yes. Yes to being ok with it, happy even. Yes to bringing a child into the world and yes to all the joy, laughter, and love that will come from all of us, and all our family, towards and from this child.

When we first found out, all we could think about was how HARD it will be. All our kids are a bit older! We didn't want to have anymore! And... to be totally honest here..... we've been through it before. I was pregnant before, with Cole, and I had an abortion. It was very emotionally difficult, but at that time, it was the right choice.

Now, here we are again. After cursing ourselves and swearing up and down Coles' going to get a vasectomy, we decided to say yes. We will have a baby, have a family, adore the baby. Of course.

And it feels so good to say that.

So here I am, almost 2 months in. Clearly, I look a wee bit further along than that. Ahem. That (I'm assured by my Dr.) is because this is my fourth child, and I'm a very small person. So, I'll take that! We waited until after my first appointment to really tell anyone, and now that it's out, I hope to document of lot of this pregnancy on the blog. I think it will be fun, and also really helpful for me, looking at all the joy and love stemming from what could've been looked at as a hugely difficult situation, with only troubles. Yes, it will be difficult, but yes, yes, YES there will be love and joy.